Hi there everyone hope you are well.
I have had a busy few weeks doing things on the boat and just general catching up with jobs around the house so I have neglected the blog a little bit, so here I am to bring you all up to date with Del Boys world.
I have had my share of funny customers recently and have decided to share a few of them with you, the first one was a girl I picked up in Oxford street who wanted to go to N17, as we went on our way she told me that she had no money on her and would have to get it from her house when we arrived. I said that this wouldn’t be a problem as long as she left her phone with me while she went inside. She was happy with this arrangement and we carried on our way. A couple of minutes later she asked if it would cost more than £20 as that was all she had, so when I told her I thought that it would probably be nearer to £30 she got a bit hysterical,saying that she would have to get out and walk home but she was scared to do this as she had been attacked in the past and then she started to cry!
Now I know that this is probably a well rehearsed act and she was probably less frightened than I was but I am a very old fashioned fella where women are concerned and would never forgive myself if I turfed her out and she had come to some harm, so I told her not to worry and that I would get her home for £20. As we went on our way I suggested to her that in future she should tell the cabbie when she got in that she was short of money and that most drivers would help.
When we got near to the address that she had given me she phoned her flatmate to get him to meet us outside with the £20, after a brief conversation with him she told me that we would hve to meet him by a cash machine on Philip Lane. So off we go to find him, by this time I was starting to get a bit pi**ed off , as we were lost in the maze of no entry and one way streets that make up the local councils answer to the Crypton Factor. I am sure that I saw Lord Lucan riding Shergar in there somewhere!!!!!
After a few mins of trying to find my way back out to Philip La, not helped by the girl in the back directing me back to her road, we met up with her flat mate who had the cash. Now as I have said earlier I am a reasonable fella and I know that she had taken the mickey but I was happy that I had gotten her home safely, but when she told her flat mate to get in the cab and said “the driver will drop us home” I said that would be fine ,so long as she paid what she owed and then I would put the meter back on. “you said you would take me home for £20 ” she moaned, I did, I replied, but I didn’t know that would include a trip round N17 as well and if I had left the meter on you would probably owe me nearer £40 now, so if you want me to drop you and your fella home you will have to pay the fare.
Needless to say they walked home.
A few days later I was driving down Edgware Rd and was hailed by a young lady and 2 fellas wanting to go to Taunton Place, off of Park Rd NW1. So off we go and along the way the lady was telling me that they had had a nightmare getting a cab as every one that had stopped had driven off when they heard the destination. The 2 fellas were carrying food and 1 had a bottle of beer, so I asked them to be careful not to spill the beer and to wait tilll they were home before starting to eat “no problem” they replied. When we arrived at the address there was £6.40 on the meter and the fella with the beer handed me a tenner and said “i’ll have my change”. After he said that the lady said £3 will be fine. So I gave him the £3 and he proceeded to tell the other bloke “you have to watch these cabbies as they will all steal your change”.
Now that gave me the hump so I challenged him as to why he would say that and his reply was,” in the past 1 of your partners in crime drove off without giving me my change”. So I told him just because somebody that I probably had never met had ripped him off it didn’t give him the right to accuse every other cab driver of being a thief, in fact I told him that just because he was a wan**r it didn’t mean that my next customer would be did it?
Well he said that the fare was £6.40 and you only gave me £3 change so what does that make you? The lady then told him that she had told me to keep the 60p to which he replied that it was his money and I should only listen to him. By now I was getting the right hump ,so I chucked his 60p through the partition and told him to get out as I wanted to go back to work but he seemed to want to have a row. The other fella and the lady were telling him to go inside but he was insistant in trying to get me to have a ruck. Eventually I lost my temper and said that if he didn’t get out I would have to come round and forcably evict him. At this point his mate grabbed him by the collar and dragged him out and the lady came to the passenger window and appologised for his behaviour.
On Tuesday this week I was going down Park Lane and saw a miniscab driver trying to get a fella to get in. The fella walking said to him that he was walking back to his hotel as it was close by and also that he didn,t like being touted. At this point the tout got out of his car gave the fella a card and said that if he phoned the number then they would book the ride and he would be legal! The fella still refused and walked on.
I heard this week that the Royal Oak canteen was going to be closed down and the land turned into a green space for the Paddington Basin development. It seems that the powers that be are determined to take away anywhere that we use. It wont be long till night drivers only have the Iron Lung to go for a pee and you can bet your life that if that happens the council will put in 24hr parking restrictions and a new bloody cctv camera.
I picked up a couple of young lads in Oxford street on thursday who wanted to go to Elstree. so after telling them how much roughly it would be off we went. I thought I had seen one of them on the telly but I couldn’t tell you where and I never ask as it seems a bit rude to me. Anyway it didn’t take long for them to doze off and by the time we arrived at their hotel they were fast asleep. It was a bit of a struggle to wake them but they eventually came round. We were in the carpark of the hotel and after I had told them how much was on the meter they seemed to have a bit of a problem finding the cash,now I knew they had it on them as I had shown me some cash when they got in so I wasn’t too worried. As we stood there the night man came out of the hotel to see what was going on and when he saw the 2 lads he said”oh its them 2 pissheads”, it seems that he had had problems with them before. He asked if he could help but was a bit miffed when I said that they were £25 short and told the lads that they would have to pay me or he would call the cops! Nice to have somebody on our side for a change. Anyway after a bit of searching the lads found the right money and as they went to walk away the porter said to them “what about a tip for the driver,as you have messed him around” with that they had another search and handed me about another £5 in change.
Well thats enough from me for today ,I’ll be back later in the week with more from the world of Del Boy.